Scarecrow and Mrs. Beasley

I had a feeling she was a spy, but didn't have any proof until I dug up this picture.

R

Scarecrow and Mrs. Beasley

Moran: (looks dubiously at Allison) I think you’re a spy.
Allison: What?
Moran: You know, like on Scarecrow and Mrs. King.
Allison: (laughs)
Moran: The library is just a cover up for your covert mission, isn’t it?
Allison: Was that what Mrs. King was on that show?
Moran: Yeah, she was a domestic housewife/secret agent. Don’t you remember?
Allison: I never watched that show!
Moran: That was a great show. She had a closet with a secret room within it. It was awesome.
Allison: Why do you think I’m a secret agent?
Moran: Because you look shifty. I think you answer the phone “Kankakee Public Library?” and then you realize that it’s really your “other” phone ringing and you answer that, “Agent Beasley, may I help you?”
Allison: I think you’re the only guy that watched that show.
Moran: Well, who watched it then since it ran for like 4 years??
Allison: Housewives! You watched a housewife show.
Moran: whatever. You’re a spy.

Random Meetings with Gods

So, I was in the local mall this evening trying to get more research material for my upcoming heist (namely I was at Suncoast video picking up a copy of Oceans 11, the Pitt/Clooney version).

After a very short visit at said video store (good staff there, much better selection that the local Wal-Mart), we proceeded to the Panera for a late dinner. Stepping up in line, I spied what appeared to be a young man taking orders (think Topher Grace with much bushier hair) but I was shocked to find out that he was actually "Thor Lightning God". How did I know this? Well, his name badge was emblazoned with this EXACT title in god-like blue and black. I was thoroughly impressed and by sheer will alone managed to move into his line. So, orders placed, I mention out loud that it is quite an honor to be waited on by Thor HIMSELF and mused about why he had been "demoted" to this position hoping that I did not anger the almighty lightning god. Well, Thor was in good humor that night (luckily for me) and told me that he was just down here helping out at the local Panera. I told him that was very big of him, as his co-workers looked on as if we were out of our minds. He told me that he liked my shirt (which happened to be my Gambit shirt) and proceeded to ask me my name so that they could call it when my order was up. I told him my "civilian" name, which he started to type into his register, but then he stopped short and asked if he could put "Gambit" in. I said that would be fine. All this time, Michelle is looking on like we're both a bit off our rockers. I looked at her and said "What is wrong with a GOD and Superhero rapping about stuff now and then?" She shook her head and I walked off to get my drink saying something about a "mere mortal" not understanding the lives of gods and superheros.

Later on, Michelle went up for a scone and came back with two. I looked at her quizzically and she said that she thinks that Thor (who had waited on her again) liked me because she only paid for 1 scone. I nodded my head knowingly. "I knew we could depend on Thor. He's one of the good ones."

All in all, the best mall visit I've had in a while.

Back to my heist research.

R

Doug's Farm Wine

Anyone who was there last night at poker knew this was inevitable. I think he has a new career on the horizon.

vstan

Yesterday it was my birthday

Yesterday it was my birthday
I hung one more year on the line
I should be depressed
My life's a mess
but I'm havin a good time

ps
vstan

My new shirt!

You say it's your birthday!!!! It's my birthday too!! Yeah!

I love that several of you were thinking of me into the wee hours of the morning on my very special day. It makes me all warm and squishy inside...either that or I sat in something.

If anyone is looking for a last minute present for me I would like one of these beautifully embroidered shirts from the following website...

http://www.lochers.com/index.html
I am partial to the "Will Fuck For Shoes", "I Like It Rough" and "I Love Porn". It's like the manufacturer was speaking to me. A clothes line just for me. Forget Stefani rocking the L.A.M.B., this stuff is the bomb. I wear a small.

I love you all!
LYLARS
vstan

Random!!!

Waffle Keyboard

vstan

Muppet Lust

vstan

Mmmmm...hamburgers...

vstan

Sorry for all the posts, but I'm bored.

This is the weirdest thing I've ever seen.

Contest!!!!!

Time for more Phtotoshop Phun! What is Ron Thinking about?

Ok, this one might be a little more difficult.

Mii

Guess

Tin Foil

I am so excited for the camping trip. I am like a kid waiting for their birthday party to roll around. I don't know if I can wait until June 9th. I might go crazy before then. You might see me walking down the street like this....





I might be talking to my imaginary pet about my camping trip or something. Is anyone else this excited?
Vstan

Wii Mii

I have been devoting all of my free time to playing Nintendo Wii. On the Wii I created a bunch of people we should all know. A Wii character is called a Mii. Ready? Guess this Mii...




Bitchell

Meatballs

Vstan

Got My Crew...and the Monkey. It's ON!

So Tasty You'll FREAK!

Officer Ron

Officer Ron breaks up small home poker game rings in his spare time.

Vstan

Blow

The official toxicity limit for humans is between one and one and half grams of cocaine depending on body weight. I was averaging five grams a day, maybe more.

CHALLENGE!

i propose new cannon fodder for the photoshopping!!!!

1)

















2)

the best awkward moment of recent history.

i had the best awkward moment ever the other day with kristina. i thought it was worth the time, space and energy required to put it into print.


http://media.jadetree.com/The_Promise_R-I_Never_Trust.mp3

me: you'll have to tell me what you think of this. i got it for eight dollars.

(long silence)
me: so what do you think of it? pretty catchy, eh?
her: i think i'd like it a lot better if the singer didn't sound like he had a speech impediment.
me: davey vonbohlen? oh, he does have a speech impediment.
her: ...oh.

When the door shuts...

MDizzle

A-ha!

Take on meeeeeeeee!

Take me oooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

Me and my boys!

Vstan

Time to get sappy

If you ask me…and you should…it’s the small things in life that matter. Actually, not even material things but gestures. It is small gestures from people that mean a great deal to me.

I remember once when I was a bratty, sulky teenager my mom randomly bought me a pair of Fido Dido socks and I was so happy and it really brought a smile to her face. It’s not the big productions in life that are important it all boils down to a pair of socks.

Whether it be for friends, family or loved ones I think this is an important thing to do for people and we should all do it more often. When people tell me that they thought of me because they saw Peeps at the store or heard Simon and Garfunkel on the radio or watched the Rocky Horror Picture Show I get all warm and squishy inside. When someone remembers something I like and they take some sort of small action to show that they care about me it’s a very big deal.

What prompted me to write this blog is this…

It means a lot to me that someone is willing to lend with their well loved, covered in dried blood, kangaroo, cuddly, security good luck item along with a well loved bouncy super ball with sparkles on it. Only a true friend would lend this kind of thing out. In my time of need that I am going through right now my friends are there to listen when I need them and lend me their security items when I am scared out of my mind. You all mean a lot to me and I want to thank you for all being their for me in your own way!
Vicki